The new mower, along with the grass trimmer that doubles as a leaf blower. I will now take morning walks to the shed to sip coffee and commune with these glorious machines and mainline testosterone.

O Lord, I give joyful thanks for the lawn equipment you have given me. . . .

Apparently, my mower decided it had had enough of this grass-cutting shit. It died on me yesterday. I think God is pissed at me for last week's post. Maybe I should go ahead and apologize now. . . .